a_sin_for_him | IC Contact

[Scar takes a deep breath.]

You're still going to do it anyway. There is no sense in trying to convince me to feel better about it.

I just wish I could understand why it bothers you so much. I know Greed's a man, but...

He's my closest friend. It's not as though we're going to be living together like that. We're going to have separate rooms.

It just... isn't done, Lust. I don't see why you insist on discussing it.

Why can't it be done? I mean that seriously. Why can't two people who happen to be different genders share a building?

Because if we can somehow work out small issues, we might have some chance at the big ones.

It's... a human thing. When people live together, there is a certain obligation to one another that I know he doesn't care about. I don't want to discuss this. Even if I took the time to explain, you wouldn't understand.

Alright. I confess, I'm ignorant of many human conventions and can't understand a number of them. Try as I might.

[It's not a point she can argue, even if she wanted to.]

But...he does care about me and look out for me. Perhaps not in a human way, but we're neither of us really human.

That doesn't make him a good... partner, or whatever you're calling it. He is still reckless and impulsive.

[So yes. Scar's entire problem can be boiled down to "I don't approve."]

I know he is. But what does that matter? He's my closest friend, I'm not trying to be him.

He also cares about me, and takes care of me, and swore to protect me if I needed it. He understands me and cheers me up when I'm sad and wants me to be happy. He listens to me even when I'm talking about nothing and want to talk to fill the silence. Those things do make him a good friend.

Any number of them make anyone a good friend.

[Hint hint, Scar.]

It matters because he's exactly the type to get caught up in a bad situation without even realizing it.

And I don't need his laundry list, either.

[Oh, he gets your hint. And he's going to be a contrary toddler and act like he's ignoring it.]

Anyone can get caught up in a bad situation without realizing it.

I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to... I didn't mean it that way. I do appreciate that you're concerned about who I trust, but he's not as bad as you think he is. That's all I'm trying to explain.

[Scar frowns, watching Miriam instead of the 'Gear screen.]

That's just something we're not going to agree on.

Alright, we'll agree to disagree.

I've made other friends, here. I'm starting to, anyway.

It isn't difficult.

[He doesn't mean that as an insult. It's simply an observation. He just doesn't have the tact to clear that up.]

There is a surprising number of younger people, who have been taken here. They trip over themselves to meet others.

I've noticed. The people I seem to get along with best outside of my own are young people.

But then again, I'm young people. More or less.

That's true.

[He continues to watch Miriam rather than the screen.]

It's strange. Seeing all of these people who could very well be your age, or my age. They're all of them very... different. Younger in heart and mind.

The number of years a person lives doesn't have much to do with it, I don't think.

But I suppose I can't really say, I've always been more or less the same. I've wondered sometimes, what it's like. To be a child, to grow up.

Of course it doesn't.

[His voice lowers.]

But it does make me wonder how many I've lost.

[Scar finally looks up at Lust.]

It has its ups and downs.

The ones lost don't matter, it's the ones still ahead that do.

It seems like such a strange idea to me, changing so much over so long a time.

It would be even stranger if it happened quickly. I never really thought about it.

[Likely because everything fell apart right at that time, but he doesn't mention that. He's only just begun recognizing it himself. Maybe that's been his issue all along. He never really did grow up. Not properly, anyway. A sadness crosses his face, when it dawns on him.]

That is far easier said than practiced.

Quick makes more sense to me. It's easy, getting a start in the same shape you'll always be.

Almost everything is, I'm finding. [Lust's voice grows quiet.] It's frightening, in a way, isn't it? All that unknown and indeterminable future ahead?

[Scar only offers a slight shrug at that. He would argue that coming into being like that simply isn't natural, but he can recognize that that wouldn't be the right thing to say, right now.]

I haven't known any other way of living. From one day to the next.

[Not in a long, long time.]

It frightens me. I don't have any real goals, there's no path to follow. It's just days after days after days stretching out, so empty and so vast with unknowable potential that it's overwhelming.

I've never lived like this before.

[Scar pauses for a moment, watching her and frowning.]

Do you have no goals you wished to pursue when you became human?

[It's an honest question. She hasn't thought about what she wants to do with her life? Even now?]

I did, back home, when I was under the belief my humanity would be different than this.

Now...I don't know anymore. Not in any long term sense.

Then maybe you ought to consider what those goals were, and adapt them to something attainable here.

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