a_sin_for_him | Fourth Wall - Goldenrod

[Lust isn't at all prepared for this madness. She'd settled into this strange little life, more or less, and thrown herself into making the most of it. She wasn't prepared for her homunculus nature to suddenly return, or to find herself going from one place to another as though towns were only a few footsteps apart. But it isn't bad.

She's almost glad for her abilities back. It's like wearing a familiar and comfortable coat. She hasn't quite settled into humanity yet, and she feels more like herself. She finds herself idly flicking her talons out every now and again, extending and retracting them like someone snapping their fingers as they go along. And traveling so fast is nothing to complain about, if startling the first time or two.

It's even paid off. She's finally made the effort to catch a pokemon, though she's almost wishing she hadn't bothered. Another improbably cutesy furry round thing. Pink this time. Wonderful, her animals are color coded by gender.

She doesn't know what to do with it now. At least she's in a large town, though she's not sure if that really matters right now. Nothing's normal.

At least it's bound to be an interesting day. If nothing else, abnormality could be exploited in beneficial ways.]

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How unpleasant are we dancing around? Altogether, I mean. This is supposed to be a nice place. Why does everything always have to get muddied up with unpleasantness?

[It's simply a musing on the state of existence in general, not any displeasure that Greed's a bearer of bad news. There other conversations haven't been what can be described as 'pleasant'. How can they be? What good things do homunculi have to talk about?]

[Greed shrugs again in an attempt to mask the sad look he gives Lust.]

Seems like Envy is the only one of us who is truly happy here. I'm not sure how I feel about that, to be frank. Then again he's been here longer than either of us.

Maybe things will get better with enough time.

Years. And not being alone helped, I think. Having someone who loves him and supports him and doesn't give a damn what he is.

[Surely if Envy can find that, she can. Maybe not where she wants it, she's not some naive idiot, but surely there's someone in this strange world who can love her as she is.]

It has to get better.

Yeah. I think so. Guy's got a lot of friends here and that's certainly not a bad thing. It's helped him a lot.

[He's a little jealous of it because back before everything went to hell, Greed had had friends. Friends he cared about a great deal but who were all dead now, save for maybe Marta.]

It got better for him. I'm sure it can get better for us.

[Because the two of them are much saner than Envy was when both of them knew him.]

How did he do it?

[Because she won't just as Envy, at least not under normal circumstances.]

I'm pleasant enough and attractive and well mannered and I can't even...

[She shakes her head, frustrated.]

At least you're good with people. They like you. You have charisma.

I... don't know. I don't think I could ask him that question.

[He gives Lust a sad look. He's certainly slept with a lot of different people, but that's not the same thing as being with someone who loves him and he knows it.

He's not even sure if he is capable of that sort of commitment. Not when he's still in love with Dante.]

I'm good with people, but that doesn't mean I'm someone who has people professing their love to me. I try to keep some distance. [As much as he wants to be surrounded by people, he is also somewhat terrified about the idea of someone telling him they love him.] I've only had that happen once, and... well. Those circumstances were complicated.

Complicated.

[Lust snorts and looks upward, arms folded.]

A man loved me once. He was kind and brilliant and good hearted and willing to give up everything for me. I think he wanted to marry me. I couldn't handle that. It ended...poorly.

[And they'd never even slept together. There was some sort of dark humor or irony or something in that. It probably would have been nice, if they had. Would it have made any difference? Probably not.]

Anyway, I mean that people are drawn to you. And you know how to talk to them, engage them. You don't have to rely on your sex appeal to keep anyone's attention.

[Look, Lust he really doesn't want to talk about the dead woman Dante had you replace. He doesn't hate Lust for it, but boy is it sort of a horrible conversation topic.]

I...

[He's terrible at apologies and he's not sure this is something to apologize for anyway.]

That's not something I control.

It doesn't mean that you can't have people drawn to you. That you're not going to find someone who cares about you. You don't have to rely on the weapons Dante gave you here. You don't have to rely on beauty alone any more.

You're free to be your own person.

I learned that lesson a long time ago.

[If there's one thing meeting the other Greed has taught him, it's that the homunculi from their world are horribly damaged people with perhaps the sole exception of Pride.]

It's not as though I blame you for your personality. It's a simple fact that you're out of the gate better equipped for daily human interaction than I am. One I'd be thankful for, if I were you.

[Lust gave Greed a mild look.]

I know I'm my own person now. Unfortunately, that person isn't a particularly pleasant or sweet one. And it's not fair, because the woman I was made from was. I don't know much about her, but I know that. So why aren't I? I'm abrasive and argumentative and insubordinate. I have little patience and a cruel tongue. I don't even have applicable skills, I'm a licensed mistress. I live off of Envy's rich boyfriend.

[Well, now's as good a time as any for a self pity party. These are things Lust has thought but not given voice to. For whatever reason, she's comfortable airing these things to Greed. At least she knows he won't think she's foolish or childish.]

[Greed's good enough at the pity party that he's not about to stop Lust from her own.]

I have no memory of the man I used to be. Not enough to give me a personality to go by and the people who could tell me have been dead for centuries.

No... Dante knew, I think. But she'd never tell me anything about him because she wouldn't want me to have any desire to become him.

I couldn't tell you how we work, exactly. How we can look like the dead but not act like them. But if you act nothing like that person, I probably act nothing like the one I was created from either.

I don't know if it's possible for we homunculi to be nice without a lot of practice.

Fourth Wall - Goldenrod - Action

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